The Winter of Our Content

That's what the huge pine trees across the pond look like this snowy morning. It's basically white out there, all visuals hazy with a mist of snow blowing over all. Wow. It's beautiful! I don't think I've even seen a 4 wheel drive truck go by on the roads this morning. We're all sitting tight.

I haven't been blogging in a while, this computer was in the shop with virus problems. Got it back late last week and we can get back into the swing of things again. With the snow, there's not much else to do anyway!

I don't know why I called this post the Winter of Our Content--I suppose, lifting it from Shakespeare ("Winter of our discontent") but to express the mixed emotions of this particular wintertime. I've had many setbacks the past few months: wrecked a car, been snowed in for a week at a time, computer down and out, friend Fred broke his leg and is in the hospital, aggravating sinus problems, not to mention major doom and gloom predictions from the Gruff Lord, Michael of Staying Alive. All the news has been horrible. So why am I not depressed as I usually am in winter, with seasonal affective disorder (SAD)? Damned if I know, but I'm not. I think it is because I'm getting better at letting go of non-essentials. What I would have considered essential a few months ago, say a functional auto, a working computer, somehow just didn't seem so necessary to me. I could work around it. If I needed a ride to town, I could ask a friend. And my sense of independence wasn't wounded by that. I could relax and let it be. In other words, I wasn't stressing out over all the problems. Some switch in me got flipped and I could look at the reality of what was, but not necessarily call it "a problem."

How did that happen? How did not having a functioning car become a non-problem? I'm not sure--there's no magic pill or herb for this one. But rather than be upset and nervous, twitching my nights away worrying about it, I've somehow moved it from the category of "awful problem" to a new category "we'll solve that one when we have more options." This is somewhat unfamiliar territory to me and I'm in the process of wondering about it, trying to figure it out. But it's interesting at any rate. Feels like one of those big changes people go through every ten years or so--a new psychological stance of some kind. I feel more adaptive, or rather, more able to adapt to what it without demanding that Reality conform to my desires. I suspect this change will stand me in good stead. I hope anyway.

Well, enough blathering about inward landscaping. I think maybe I'll get dressed up in all my deep snow accoutrements and go out and play. :) (I can barely see across the pond...will I be able to find my way home if I go to a neighbor's house for a cup of coffee? Hmmmmmm)

Enjoy your days in all the ways you can!
Onwards,
HM